New Perspective: Missing NYC

Hey all. I'm back! I was traveling between Christmas and New Year's and actually spent the last week enjoying 85-degree weather and blue Caribbean waters in Mexico.

I've written before about how hard it is for me to "re-enter" NYC after being away, but this time, something's different. For one, I've been reflecting on how proud I felt to be able to say I was from NYC when asked while traveling. I could really feel the admiration foreigners felt for my city (one woman asked me if it life here was really like "Sex and the City") and was grateful to be a small part of it.

What is it that non-New Yorkers admire about this city? Could it be the courage it requires to survive and thrive and be challenged by such a city? If Paris stands for beauty, fashion, sophistication, then maybe NYC stands for achievement, determination, courage and ingenuity? Or is it because NYC is THE cultural capital of the United States--not only because it's the US city the world sees portrayed most often in movies and TV, but also because for so many reasons it's the city they think of first when they think of America.

We really enjoyed Mexico. It was an adventure-filled, wonderful trip. We'll miss the warmth, the easygoing vibe and the minimal clothing. We gained a better understanding of and appreciation for Mexico, particularly its history, people and natural landscape, and we were sad to leave.

But when we walked through the door of our apartment on Saturday, I was happy to see my little apartment and sleep in my own bed. And once the laundry was done, the suitcase put away, and the photos from my trip downloaded onto my computer, I felt complete again.

I'm eager to start the New Year and look forward to all the beautiful things this year and this city have in store. I guess slowly but surely I am becoming a New Yorker...each time I leave and return, it feels more and more like home.

Happy New Year, everyone!

New Perspective: Small Apartment Insecurity & Entertaining

This photo ("borrowed" from NYT.com) of NY Times food writer Mark Bittman in his home kitchen made my day. As one of countless Manhattanites who suffer from what I like to call "small apartment insecurity," I thought here's one of us! And he's not ashamed to show the world he's got a small one...kitchen, that is.

I particular loved the discussion that this photo generated on the NYT site. Some were surprised that such a venerable food expert would be cooking in such a small, low on frills kitchen, but other astute commenters reasoned that the people with lavish kitchens are the very ones who order in all the time.

City Guy and I hardly ever entertain in our 555 square feet (68 of that a nice-sized kitchen) studio apartment and we never have overnight guests. That's more space than a lot of people in NYC have (and we have lovely high ceilings!), and it's all we need for the two of us. When I moved in with City Guy a year and a half ago, I thought we'd end up killing each other living in a studio, but now I think when we get around to buying our 1 or 2 bedroom condo, I'm going to miss the intimacy of always being in the same room as my husband. It's also easy to keep neat and clean, and we like that manageability.

That said, when it comes to having people over, "When we move..." is my mantra. When we move, I'll have dinner parties. When we move, my mother-in-law can visit. When we move, my friends will drop in at all hours.

Maybe Manhattan's thriving food culture is fed by legions of people just like us, who'd rather meet up with friends at a restaurant than invite people over to their little apartments?

The NY Times also had another great article about how couples are choosing to raise their kids in smaller apartments, just so they can stay in Manhattan. I completely relate to this love of Manhattan. The lure of more square footage is strong, to be sure, but I can also see making do in Manhattan at least until our kids (just theoretical at this point) reach an age when they need their privacy. It's an interesting dilemma, one that my friends in California just can't relate to--i.e., we live in an apartment the size of most of their guest houses.

The truth is I love that in NYC people do with smaller and less. In the "green" revolution, the rest of the world should be taking a cue from us. We use less electricity, take up less space, have a smaller impact on the environment.

So why such shame? Because more square footage and designer furniture signals money and status? Because in the rest of the country, living in 555 square feet seems down right third-world. Sure, but shouldn't I trust my friends to like me for me, not the size of my apartment?

Which is why I took a big step on Monday. I invited Funny Dude (I've known for almost ten years now, he's been to our place before, and he lives in a small apartment himself --figured he'd be most forgiving) over and cooked dinner for him. I cook for City Guy almost every night, but somehow cooking for someone else really made me nervous. I planned the meal in advance, shopped for ingredients and stressed about the preparation. The food didn't turn out as tasty as I had hoped, and it was an hour late getting to the table, but it was nice to have someone over, and I hope he'll forgive me for being such a disastrous hostess. It was my first time. No shame in that, right?

The upshot is it felt good. It's a small step on my road to recovery, and I hope I'm brave enough to keep do it again.

P.S. If you are suffering from "small apartment insecurity," the entries in Apartment Therapy's annual Small Cool Apartment Contest will inspire you. All entries are under 850 square feet.

On My Mind: 5 Reasons I'm Grateful To Be In NYC

Today, I'm happy to be a New Yorker. Today, the city feels open and full of possibility. So, thank you, NYC, for....

1. City Guy, my husband whom I adore. This is the city that brought us together, and without him, I would never have become as interesting a person as I am today.
   
2. Being a foodie heaven. LA has great food and a diversity of flavor, but New Yorkers just take their love of food more seriously. Food festivals, world-class chefs, world-class culinary institutes, greenmarkets....what joy!
3. Having a competitive running culture. You don't get to run along the beach, and the weather isn't cooperative most of the year, but I feel myself taking my running more seriously here. I certainly never ran so many races living in LA. And I'm so looking forward to running the legendary NYC marathon this year!
4. Bringing anything and everything here. No matter how niche my interest or desire, I know I'll find what I'm looking for somewhere in the city, and if not, it will come to NY eventually.
5. Always keeping me entertained and teaching me new things. I know I'll never get bored living here!

Stuff I've Learned:Why the Sex and the City Movie Made Me Love NYC Again

Last night, Miss Fashion and I saw the Sex and the City movie at the Loews Village 7. It was 5:30 on a Thursday, but the theater was packed, which shows me that no matter what the stodgy old bald critics say, we girls love what we love. And our verdict? We loved it!! Seriously, you'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll think deep thoughts, you'll think superficial thoughts...

As we walked out of the theater, I kept gushing about how surprisingly good it was, how it was now officially one of my most favorite chick flicks--rivaling my love for Bridget Jones' Diary. It was like I'd just had a moment of grace or something. Maybe I had. I'd been in the doldrums for a couple days, but by the time I left the theater, I swear my face muscles were sore, as they say, from all the smiling I did throughout the film.

Why? I don't want to give anything away, and I think it helped that I had low expectations going in, but to begin with, how can you not love the candy-colored, perfectly lit parade of fashion, friendship and fine-ass men that is Sex and the City?

In what other city do women take their fashion so seriously? Yes, you can say it's superficial and materialistic, but the way I look at it, it's wearable art, and when you're confronted by beauty, even if you yourself can't afford it, you have to gives props.

You can't help but imagine yourself living that life. I also appreciate how real they kept things - the girls are married, have kids, are older now, and the movie explores the challenges women face at this phase in their lives. It's like we've grown up--all of us girls. Then again, Sex and the City has always aired the issues, problems, feelings we girls don't like to talk about, except with our best friends. This is a movie that will make you glad for your best girlfriends. I wished mine were all here in NYC with me.

And of course, there's Big, out modern-day prince charming. You know what I'm talking about. (Oh, and the massive eye-candy that is Samantha's next door neighbor in LA--oh my...)

Most importantly, the movie reminded me of how optimistic and excited I was before moving to the City all those years ago. When I was in LA, I used to watch the series and imagine finding love, success, friendship...great fashion in the City. I imagined my life would be exciting, stimulating, that I would grow my wings and really take flight here.

Carrie says in the movie, 20-something girls move to New York to find the two L's: Love and Labels (fashion, that is)--which is a clever line, but somehow struck a chord with me. I did find my love in NYC, so at least I got that right. And I guess I found my labels too, to a degree, because when I was watching the movie last night, I could identify so many more "insider NY" things than before--like the fashions, the restaurants, the characters, the looking for a perfect condo. This time, it felt like a movie about my city, not just a city I wanted to be part of. And I'd never felt that way before.

Samantha actually lives in LA for most of the film, and I was thinking about how much I do still love LA--the house she lives in on the beach is what my dream home would look like. But the character arc that she goes through reminded me that in NY, even though the city has kicked my ass many times, I'm probably a stronger, more dynamic person and in some ways, more my true self than I would be anywhere else. It's a straightforward city, like a true New Yorker. It tells you what you have to do in order to achieve your dreams. Those who can't ante up can leave, I guess, but then you'll never know who you could have been.

For the time being, I'm still basking in the glow of the movie and dreaming of the day when I can have Carrie's 5th Avenue closet...fully stocked, of course.

New Perspective: Macy's Herald Square

I work from home, so theoretically I have the luxury of stepping away from my desk and exploring the city any day of the week. In reality, I find myself scheduling all my social activities, errands, grocery shopping, lunch meetings on the same day so I don't have to leave the house for the rest of the week. Why change out of your house clothes and get dolled up when you don't have to? It's really unhealthy, I know. I'm trying not to be a hermit.

So I've been putting off returning something to Macy's for days. City Guy and I made a purchase this past weekend on maybe my fifth trip to the store in all my years living here. I guess you could say I dread going to Macy's--Macy's and Times Square are two places where New Yorkers are always outnumbered by tourists, and tourists, bless their hearts, are there to enjoy themselves, not move efficiently, and New Yorkers value efficient movement.

So I thought I'd avoid the crowds and get there a before 11 am, and you know what? It was nice. The floor staff is helpful, smiling and pleasant. You can take your time browsing without feeling like you're in a medieval market.

It's lovely on a weekday before noon. Try it sometime.

Highlights:

• The old-school elevators. They're wooden and so rickety you feel like some part of you is going to get caught and pull you under, but that's the fun.
  
• The shoe department on the 5th floor. Even at 11 am on a Weds, as you can see, women love their shoes.
  
• In a city where everyone feels the pressure to pay way too much for designer goods (myself included), it's nice to just walk the floors on an uncrowded day, not paying attention to the labels. You might find yourself stopped by a cute spring dress that's really well made, looks great on you...and then you won't care what it says on the label, except the price.